This Loving You

This loving you
in the full belly of this hot sticky pregnant south
bruised blue and purple summer thunderheads
bleeding sweet relief on the suburbs
and the swamps alike

This loving you
on Friday nights smoking cigarettes and sweating
porch light beacon for bulbous beetles piloted by the blind
dogs out there barking mad cause cats
   have the real freedom
cats come and go
cats with reserved love
teach me feline lessons
teach me to deny you

This loving you
on Saturday mornings wrapped in sunlight and white bed sheets
your breath like a child's snore
an aromatic mix
hint of vodka
hint of tar
hint of the last of me to reach your lips after you woke me up
in the middle of the night
with your teeth
and the sweep of your breasts pressed against

This loving you
in the distances we've allowed
perfected
forsaken
all this time we've wasted
still defiantly believing that we'll live forever
a lifetime is plenty enough time
wait to say what you should say

-not today
-tomorrow
come alive then

This loving you
is getting old.

TA