Broken Elevator Book Club

I cheered a distant silent flutter
you finally found him
the Author
our conspiracy now transmogrified
a new night moth born
a penetrative sin stroking something deeper
love like the pearls from the anus of an angel
he flummoxed you
he flummoxed me too
was the mad Pluck white?
or black??
he is most certainly with the mountain monks now
oh, he is indeed their problem

we underline scriptures in hospital scrubs
in Eve's leaves
quoted verses, made a progress of some sort

we found something from afar
a new kind of fingering in the wet temporal lobe
bed of paperback pages
slick pen slash stroke against yellow flesh
suspended typeset like a taunting worm
a witch's curling finger beckons us
where candy lay
where magic lurks

I picture you there across the million miles
fingering his crooked spine
following his mischievous modifiers with dangling perversion
a mouth full of rain and coffee water
stoned on the vapor trails of bygone lovers
aroused by a novel's unknown owners
tickled lightly to beginning
later lasso'd
ah, this new chapter in our love affair.

TA

Losing the Tether to Myself

These days
I mostly hug my mother
in parking lots
outside Mexican restaurants
we catch  up sharing stories sharing chalupas
the long talk about her grandchildren
nieces and nephews
we talk about family, mostly
we sound sincere, I guess
and repetitive no doubt

she gives me room to find myself
whatever it might be I'm chasing
chatter about lost goals
my invented hope
I update the terms of unbound existence
my quixotic ambition
sometimes we even cry together

everyone seems to be someone I've seen before
that kind of guy
this kind of woman
adults playing dress-up
I remember these faces from when I was a kid
looking up at the unfolding story of my parents' life
a baseball collection of cast members
trying to place them in proper sleeves
figure them all out
which fits best
I wonder which one of them I've become

none of us are new under the sun
we are all flotsam floating together
is anyone ever anchored?
my god! half my concentration is spent
trying to keep quiet
silence the loud death wailing inside of me
for something lost

we are all labels on a foreman's clipboard
supervisor of a factory floor in the ethos
kindly cerebral gentleman
sadness that can't be healed
quirky fixer upper
lost in Neverland
gypsy daughter
misguided and misguiding
petroleum brain
thirsty for sin
little sister
forever in a fight
good son
playing the bad boy's part
wanton wife
miserable in her love

no one in my mother's bloodline will become an astronaut
I'm beginning to see that now
I conducted an orchestra with a lead pencil
I hunted wild rabbits through the poison green of the deep south
I slept with an alligator in the mud
we rolled together like lovers on the banks of a drainage canal
but he was too strong.

TA

Robert

Robert my dog
and Robert my woman
these old calloused prints
bundle of fetched red cedar
from cranny
from nooks in the rock

I spear the fat horny bull
fat flank muscles and velvet crown
foot pursuit through fetid fern
the gilded hunting horn bellows
Robert my dog sniffs the blood on the bark
and Robert my woman waits hungry

Robert soft and downy gold
Robert with a witch's smile
she greets me hysterical
an animal taste on her tongue
she finds my girded hips and pulls me close
Robert in sin
Robert in gory detail swallows the bull

I am fecund, tonight only
I am engorged with blood and lust
Robert my beloved
Robert my steady right hand.

TA

Perse Reflection

No angered angel stays buried
my black heart heavy with want
your resurrected figure
the weight of your pressing down on my senses

I eject your name into endless starscape
out o'er lonely cliffs whose names we've mostly forgotten
to lonely listeners
an orchestral herd of canyon elk
chattering squirrel disruptive
wake the brookie sleek
thrown willy-nilly into moon's cold shadow

they take turns to mourn with me
to climax with me
into pine scent and powder
into constellation epiphany
sobbing over phony photographs
and lewd memories

I come near a crawling cuck
through wooded trails
through graveyard aisles
through your front door ghost house
to cover you in a crown of cum
(of love?)

I'm here still living trying to say a something
so much something
I guess I mean it?
in some strange temporal out-of-body kind of way

sparkling calligraphy of coke dust on your tits
poor child of mania and fury
of lust and fever
wild animal doomed to violence
if I could only trap you long enough
I would love you forever

smoking cigarettes and rolling
the last exhalation of a bruised purple poem
a song like a memory
out my open window into the night
slipping my waxen tongue
a taste of your waning tableau

that illicit white kiss still forever on my lips
a numb rumor fading now
a whisper of a moment
when you somehow
(maybe)
did exist.

TA

Hot Tub Lamentations

Pretzel position pearl boiling
my white ass in redacted jacuzzi in a motel in Mississippi
forgotten and misshapen tub angry angles silent portals
my blue veins bulging full of gas station chemicals
a mystic plastic pantomime
grasping at miracles

she wore color over every crest and turn
arrested fearless spandex mannequin tossing her hips into the drywall
nuevo Jane Fonda tight as an Abrams tank
"the women are coming" she warned me in spital
a faucet of sweat in her hills and dells
wrestling knots of wet red muscle underneath her skin tight clothes
building that beefy bulky armor for
the future war

peptides percolating in our bloodstream
we've come here to meet our mirror self
dancing twirling flexing eye-fucking that handsome reflection
caffeine fascination doing long lines of black bean powder
too hard tonight to make dumbbell decisions
clean the inside of my heart with high octane gasoline
smash the fourth eye jewel over the stiff spit of my spine
soaken towel of terror
me calling from the skunkworks of phantasm to your tantric ghost

Return!
return so I can love you
with the my consequence of strength.

TA